Wistfulness, a slightly sad feeling caused by something that you wish to have, especially something in the past that you can no longer have. It is the smallest of things that trigger this feeling—the setting of the sun with the clouds in just the right shade of purple, the sound of the train in the distance, the way the leaves on that specific tree rustle, the flipping of a book’s pages that have turned yellow and crisp, the hearty aroma of baked potatoes. The minute things in life are the ones that etch themselves in our memories, reminding us of the past long gone, telling us of a future that has yet to start.
Sometimes, when I look back on photos of my Student Exchange Programme (SEP), I think about the snow that was as high as the top of our boots, of being enveloped by the warmth of the house after a long day out, of the fluffy pancakes drizzled with maple syrup, of the friends that I made and the world that I have seen. Going to Canada for SEP was truly an experience of a lifetime and this is my story.
PRE-EXCHANGE
Two years ago, I was on my couch, mindlessly scrolling TikTok, my eyes slowly becoming fatigued as I had been staring at the screen for way too long. A notification from Microsoft Outlook caught my eye, and I think I might have even gasped as I clicked on the email and read its contents. On it was a message from the SEP FASS coordinator, stating that I had an opportunity to do my exchange in Western University in London, Ontario, Canada. Even though I was unsure as to what interesting things there were in London—in fact, I was kind of convinced I was probably going to London in the United Kingdom—I allowed myself to revel in the news. It was a privilege, and despite the immediate concerns that I had regarding the weather and the fact that I would be in a foreign land for almost half a year, I was most definitely going to seize the opportunity. That is lesson number one, which is that even if you have doubts about accepting the offer, trust me when I say that it is worth every second that you spend planning courses, and every (almost every) cent of your money.
But of course, the idea of mapping courses over was daunting—what even was a dummy code, what IS mapping? I must have spent at least two weeks cumulatively on my laptop, my keyboards taking the brunt of my frustration as I tried to figure out all of these pertinent issues. I did not have seniors to ask, because prior to my year was COVID, which meant that my seniors did not have an opportunity to travel out of Singapore. I had Reddit, sure, but even the information was outdated. Was this going to be the tipping point where I give up and not head overseas? I did not think so.
After hours of research, I realised that mapping is equivalent to me taking courses in the partner university and then matching it to a corresponding course in NUS. Essentially, I would have “taken” the course in NUS during my university tenure when in actuality I studied the course overseas. This is useful because for NUS, the courses are graded on a Satisfactory/Unsatisfactory (S/U) basis. This means that my Grade Point Average (GPA) would remain the same as the previous semester as long as I passed the courses overseas, and this was a huge plus point for me. In instances where I was unable to find a one-to-one pairing for the courses, I would employ the dummy code tactic, which acts as a replacement course and can be counted into the academic units that you have taken. This, of course, also depends on the unit ratio; in NUS, if you take a level 2000 module, it accounts for 4 academic units, but if you take it in Europe, it might count for twenty units. These were some of the research points that I had to embark on before making my choice. During the application process, people would have already completed this step of course mapping, but things might change along the way, courses could be discontinued etc. When I was stuck, I emailed the faculty coordinator of both schools, and even if the answer may not be satisfactory, it is still an answer.
Apart from academics, I had a crippling fear of not being able to make friends and that I would have to go solo for my entire exchange. Yet again, I went to the internet for solutions. Fortunately, I chanced upon an excel sheet that helped connect students going to the same partner university together. I scrolled to “Western University” under the Canada tab, and only saw one name in the cell. Despite all my anxieties of reaching out to a stranger, I took the first move and sent a tentative “Merry Christmas!” to Megan, who is now a friend of mine. It was nerve-wracking—what if she did not reciprocate? What if she was unfriendly and wanted her own space? These thoughts filled my headspace for the next two hours, but thankfully, she replied and that was how we started talking to everyone else. We met up in July 2022, to get to know each other and to understand the expectations that we had for exchange. Although we would not meet a second time before our flight, the platform was able to help us build connections, albeit online.
Then comes the packing. How much would one have to pack for a place that is known to have winters that are biting? Standing in my room, looking at my two large empty luggage, I was lost. As I sat down, I remembered a conversation I had with a friend that came to NUS from Finland. She told me that crucially, I needed to bring an extension cable so that I did not have to bring multiple international adapters. She also mentioned that one or two small memorabilia from home would be good; personally, I brought my penguin stuffed toy because that reminded me of everyone that I cared about in Singapore. From my study desk, I swiped my JBL speaker, my laptop stand, my mouse and my Google Home mini. These were some of my tech essentials that would later make my room in Canada feel just a tad more familiar.
As I stuffed my luggage, my mom told me to bring a set of bed sheets that I could use, because there could be a case where the beds were not furnished with sheets. Even if they were, nothing could beat the smell and touch of home. As for clothes, it is entirely up to the individual, but in hindsight, I would have brought some Singapore-coded clothes because you never know when the weather might turn warm in one of your travels, and buying clothes might burn a hole in your wallet too.
Before I knew it, it was January 2023, and it was time for my arduous, close to 30-hour flight journey to Toronto. I zipped my We Bare Bear cover over my luggage, gave my room one last look before I locked the doors and headed towards the airport.
THE EXCHANGE
We heard horror stories of luggage being lost in transit, and standing there, waiting for our luggage to appear in Pearson airport was stressful. The reason for this was because we took a flight where we transited in Japan and Vancouver, which meant that there was an increased chance of our luggage not making it to the next flight. Some of my friends placed an air tag on their luggage, which turned out to be a wise decision because when their luggage actually got stuck, they knew exactly where it was and could contact the relevant authorities. Flights generally do take care of your luggage, but sometimes when you are flying to a continent as big as North America, it is better to err on the side of caution.
Armed (literally, because all of our luggage were super heavy and we had at least two each) with our entire life in our hands, we trudged through the airport to make our way to our hotel. Using an airport shuttle made the trip easier, because we were unfamiliar with the climate and roads, so being able to sit in the warmth (even for five minutes) while someone drove us to our hotel in the middle of the night was beneficial. I remember our first meal in Canada was Subway, and I was shocked at the price (SGD$15 for a full meal) but I pushed those thoughts aside because there was nothing else open at 8pm in Pearson.
When dawn arrived, we continued our journey to London via a two-hour bus ride which took us directly into our school’s premise. Even though I lived off-campus, it was still convenient for me to get an Uber to what would be my house for the next four months. We found the house on Airbnb, but if I were to redo the selection process, I think looking for actual leases online would be better and safer because of the mandatory contract that we would have had to sign. The contract would protect the tenants against any rule change that the landlord might make, and it would basically work as an insurance during the tenant’s time there. It is also important to sign the contact before arriving at the house, so that everything is transparent right from the beginning. While living on campus might arguably be better contractually because everything administrative is handled by the school, this meant longer waiting times and the rent prices might even be higher.
Although we could invite people over to our house for things like reunion dinners and birthday parties, I would sometimes think about what my life would be like if I had stayed within the vicinity of multiple groups of people, instead of my five housemates.
In the winter, going home is sometimes miserable as the interval for buses are irregular, which would cause a small, yet inevitable twinge of regret in my heart. Sometimes, I still remember the smell of the dining hall at my friend’s dormitory, and the Tuesdays that we would have lunch together; it became almost like a routine. At night, I would return home to have dinner with my housemates; we decided that cooking would be much more economical than eating out. But beyond money (note, budgeting is very important, and you can do this on an excel sheet), there is nothing that will beat the smell of home cooked food, food that smelt so much like Singapore on a freezing winter night. However, I would say that sometimes, it is okay to spend money on activities or food. Being too calculative about your money might be a turn off for the people around you, and I had to constantly remind myself that whilst I can return home to earn the bucks, memories last forever.
Most times, the journey home is after one of my many hangouts with my international friends that I made along the way. We all met during orientation, and we quickly became a group that just stuck to one another. We cooked, we sang, we celebrated, we travelled, we laughed, and we cried together. The people that you meet on exchange will be your ride-or-die, as it determines whether your exchange is one that is enriching and one like no other. Sure, you might be in a different country and the experience might be novel, but at the end of the day, a beautiful space will only become a beautiful place when memories are attached to it.
For my group, we did a lot of the planning during the trip itself, but it would be good to plan beforehand, figure out what small cities are around you and whether it is feasible to do day trips out. I did not regret a single day of my exchange as I went to multiple events hosted by the school, travelled as much as I could with the people that meant a lot to me, and built everlasting friendships.
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EPILOGUE
Just as quickly as the start of my exchange arrived, the end came way too early as well. It was April, and we were gathered at the lobby of my friends’ hall. I was bound for New York City the next day, and tearfully, I hugged my Danish and Korean friends goodbye. I knew I would see my Singaporean friends again, but it was my international friends that were geographically further away. We made promises in front of the lounge that we used to hang out at; we promised to call each other, we promised to think of each other, and most importantly, we promised that we will meet one another again, someday.
In essence, when you are on exchange, put yourself out there, be exactly as you are or be someone else. It is a new, and very big world out there—so create your own story; how it starts and ends is completely up to you.
The end.